When my site was migrated by my webhost my previous version of Movable Type stopped working completely. So now I get to start all over once again. Ah, well. My site looked like a mess anyway. It'll be a while before I get this thing looking halfway decent.

New design up at Cafepress:

Click here for a chance to purchase this lovely watercolor of a dinosaur wearing underpants painted by Anthony Clark of Nedroid.com. This could be your only opportunity to get a piece of Anthony's art at a decent price. This kid's going places, mark my words.

Jesus H Christ. The instructions that sixapart gives you to set up TypeKey are shit. If I need to enter the address for my mt-comments.cgi file, then tell me to enter the address for my mt-comments.cgi file. Shit, I thought I had the damn thing all set up and ready to go like two days ago.

A Coca-Cola commercial loosely based on the Grand Theft Auto games. By loosely, I mean that no one gets shot, stabbed, or beaten to death. Kind of disappointing. That no one gets killed or blown up I mean, not the commercial. I like the commercial. Damn catchy tune, too.

Watch Darth Vader take on the Japanese police...

after the jump.

A couple of nights ago I had an odd dream that I was fooling around with a woman wrapped from head to toe in a purple latex bodysuit. That's not so odd, you say? Sounds more like a fetish dream so far?

What made the dream so damn odd was the fact that the latex suit she was wearing was inflated to the point that it made her look like a certain purple dinosaur, if said dinosaur were covered in shiny purple latex. Worse, I was majorly turned on by this in the dream.

I'm crazy, aren't I?

"Just 7 pills every half hour and I am a goddamn cyborg."

Video after the jump.

This is something from the site before it decided to commit suicide on me. It was for a little competition, Unnecessary Movie Sequels, that took place over on the JayPinkerton.com forums. It supposedly made Jay spit coffee* on his keyboard and/or monitor. I think it's about the last thing I ever posted there that was funny.

*I'd wager it was actually beer or whiskey.

The new Cracked Magazine is out on shelves now. It's nothing like its juvenile former self (that I can remember) and is more along the lines of National Lampoon (remember them?). It has a nine page ESPN Magazine parody, two excellent ad parodies, interviews with The Daily Show's Ed Helms and Rob Corddry and South Park's Trey Parker and Matt Stone, and a bunch of other funny shit. Not bad for a first issue.

Also, here's an article about Cracked's acquisition and transformation into what it is today.

I have no idea what these Japanese gentlemen are competing for, but I'm sure it's not worth the consequences.

Video after the jump.

A little something I did for a Worth1000 contest a long time ago. I think the theme was along the lines of "proven urban myths" or something similar. I didn't win, but I had fun making it.

LikeBetter.com shows you a series of picture pairs and you pick which of the two you like better. It will then make predictions as to the type of person you are based on how you choose.

If you register, it keeps track of the pairs it's shown you and how you've guessed. You can share your results with friends via email or link directly to them on the web. How much are you like me?

LikeBetter.com, why must you make me choose between Optimus Prime and Voltron? Whyyyyy!?

Makes ya wonder what a kid's gotta do to get suspended anymore.

This is something stupid that I made when I was fooling around with Swish. I originally posted it on January 29, 2004. I don't personally think that it's one of the site's high points but there actually seem to be some people looking for it. Or I suppose it could be "butt plug" in another language. Whatever.

Update: Wow. After checking Google, it appears that the original page this was on is the number one site for "budplug" among 14,800 hits and is number one for "bud plug" among 1,760,000 hits. The fact that anything I've done being number one on Google is shocking, especially something so stupid. Also, "budplug" seems to be Dutch, but I've no idea what it means.

Damn, that's a sexy album cover. The new Iron Maiden CD hits stores on September 5th. Buy it.

I had this doozy of a dream a few nights ago. In the dream, I dream that Jay-Z (yeah that Jay-Z) hits my car. After I wake up I go outside to see if my car's okay. As I'm out there, a car comes screaming around the corner and slams right into the rear of my Intrepid! The driver gets out, dusts himself off, and damn if it isn't Jay-Z. Woot! I'm a psychic. Some stuff I can't remember happens and we both end up going to a house party at a friend's house a couple blocks over.

Jay-Z plays some euchre for cash while I hang out in the living room, drinking. There's a ton of girls there and right in the middle of the throng is Ryan Seacrest, macking. After a while I get up and leave because I'm obviously not going to get any attention with him in the room.

It's a little fuzzy here, but in the process of walking to the next room, I inadvertently get right in the way of Flavor Flav and Griff as they're dancing to a P.E. video playing on the television. Flavor Flav is furious and gets all up in my face, screaming. It's right about at this point that the dream switches on me.

Next thing I know, I'm at some kind of meeting of preachers as it's letting out. I try to get away as quickly as possible because, as we all know, preachers are scary. One of them follows me back to the house party and he grabs me. As we struggle throughout the kitchen, he starts raking my back with both hands as if to scratch the devil right out of me. Right about here the dream fades out (or at least my memory of it does).

Weird, eh?