One of the U.S. military's mine seeking dolphins is AWOL. I certainly hope he's ok. Maybe he's gettin' some play. ;)

UPDATE: Takoma came back! Ace Ventura succeeds again! Yayyyyyyyyyyy! Note how the Aussies give NO credit to Ace.

Need to find a use for all that duct tape you bought that's just lying around?

Well, I just added some e-cards to the site. For the moment, there are only cards critical of the Bush Administration, but I'll be adding more as I make them.

(I wonder how many people these will piss off.)

You're not fooling anyone, Canada. You pretend to be peaceful by not supporting the U.S. war on Iraq. Well, I just happened to stumble upon your plans for world domination. The ruse is up. Throw down your weapons or this could get ugly. ;)

Check out this x-ray of Dubya. Very cool.

The first new buddy icons for this site in ages. They'll probably piss off a lot of people. You should get one now.

The new Linkin Park CD, Meteora, hit stores today. It's pretty short. Clocks in at a little over 36 minutes. On the plus side, it's an enhanced CD containing the video for their first single, "Somewhere I Belong", and a 20 minute featurette, "The Art of Meteora". I haven't listened to it enough to really give my opinion on it yet. And, honestly, Linkin Park fans aren't going to give two shits about my opinion anyway. What are you waiting for? Get your ass out and buy it.

Oh yeah, I think Zelda for GameCube comes out today too.

Send them off to war while cutting their benefits. I can see how much more important the tax cut is than taking care of our veterans. Simply appalling.

Well, this war is certainly a reason to drink. Don't forget to toast the troops.

Just for shits and giggles I checked out my old CafePress accounts today. I actually sold some shirts. I haven't had a link for these on my site in ages. I had figured the accounts would have been deleted by now. I'm flabbergasted.

You could always support this site and buy some too.

European Union officials have launched an investigation after bugging devices were found at offices used by several delegations - including those of France, Germany and the UK.

Read this.

It's sad that bombing the hell out of Iraq is so much more important than peace in the Middle East.

France has one-upped Congress in the silly food war. (Congress recently changed the names of French fries and French toast served in their cafeteria to Freedom fries and Freedom toast, respectively.) Whether you like the snotty, beret-wearing, wine swilling, surrender-monkey French or not, you have to give them some credit for this one. A French website is sending pretzels to Bush. I'm wondering if this could be seen as an act of terrorism given the threat that pretzels have caused the president in the past. If you don't recall, President Bush passed out after choking on a pretzel early last year while watching a football game. He fell off the couch and ended up with a nasty bruise
on his face.

The score is currently:
France: 1
Congress: 0

Gee, Bill Clinton was no saint either.

"Allow the President to invade a neighboring nation, whenever he shall deem it necessary to repel an invasion and you allow him to do so whenever he may choose to say he deems it necessary for such purpose -- and you allow him to make war at pleasure. Study to see if you can fix any limit to his power in this respect. ... If, today, he should choose to say he thinks it necessary to invade Canada, to prevent the British from invading us, how could you stop him? You may say to him, 'I see no probability of the British invading us' but he will say to you, 'Be silent, I see it, if you don't.'" -Abraham Lincoln

Glommed from Ace-Comics on MicahWright.com's forums.

Oh wow, they found a manuscript that appears to be the sequel to George Orwell's "1984".

Happatai was on Jimmy Kimmel Live last night performing their awesome internet cult hit, Yatta!, and I MISSED IT! I am SOOOOOOOOOOO PISSED OFF right now. I think I'm gonna cry.

Still dead.

More news later as it becomes available.

All Wal-Mart and K-Mart stores in Iraq will be closing on or
before March 15th.

After that, they will all become Targets.

Thank you; that is all................

THANKS KAYT!

It's been said in the site's comments that I didn't read the Domestic Security Enhancement Act of 2003, A.K.A. PATRIOT II. That is correct. I didn't. Nor have I ever claimed to. Once I got past the 33 page analysis and into the actual law part of it, I was lost.

The bill is mainly a group of revisions to other laws. To be able to understand it, one must do a lot of cross-referencing to a ton of other laws. And at least one of the laws it revises is, itself, a group of revisions. I simply didn't have the desire to devote that kind of time to something I still probably wouldn't have understood. I don't speak legalese. So, I looked for some opinions on the web. I read the opinions of quite a few sites, one of which was ACLU.org. I've always been a civil rights supporter and respect their opinion (on most things. I disagree with their stance on the death penalty). So when I posted about DSEA, I included a link to the ACLU. It wasn't the first site I read about DSEA, it wasn't the last site I read about DSEA, and it certainly wasn't the only site I read about DSEA.

For me to have read only the bill's analysis and claim I read the entire thing would have been a lie. The analysis was written by the drafters of the bill. They want it to pass. Don't expect them to put in every little detail. They're counting on the Members of Congress that don't read past the analysis, lol.

I'm sure there was a point to this post. If you figure it out, let me know. ;)

"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary
safety deserve neither liberty nor safety."
- Benjamin Franklin, Historical Review of Pennsylvania, 1759.

Propaganda I'd have to say this is my favorite.

You can see the original sign and a few others here.

Could someone please tell me how spying on a person's reading habits will aid in the fight against terrorism?

This certainly didn't come as a surprise.

What can I say about a flying, guitar playing dog and two viking cats singing about a gay bar that hasn't already been said a thousand times before?

I found this nugget on theillegitimate.com.

OK, no politics this post, I promise. (Although, I have to admit, that picture of President Bush I did doesn't suck.)

This has to be one of the funniest things I've seen on the internet in a long time. I've been watching the episodes from the beginning. It made me spit up pretzels on my keyboard. Too funny.

I never intended to be political on this web site. I hate politics. But it seems every time I log on I see something else that bothers me about this current administration. While surfing thru ACLU.org today I came across something I found very disturbing. Bush and his administration are walking all over the Bill of Rights. They want to strip us of even more freedoms with the Domestic Security Enhancement Act also referred to as USA PATRIOT Act II. They also want to begin mining through all of our personal information with something they call the Total Information Awareness Program that will supposedly help them catch terrorists. Please note that it's called the "Total Information Awareness Program" not the "Terrorist Information Awareness Program." They'll be able to use this program for whatever they want to, not just for finding terrorists. Say goodbye to what's left of your privacy.

I urge you to write to your Members of Congress and let them know your opinions on this and anything else you think needs changed in this country. Please don't sit idly by while your rights are stripped away.

Posted by Joe, Mar. 3

Have you ever seen a pot smoker drive? Their top speed is like 5 mph. The worst that's gonna happen is the deer gets a car-shaped bruise on its ass. And for the record, I don't condone driving under the influence of any drugs. Especially VIAGRA! Imagine this: "Goddammit! I can't believe I forgot the condoms. If I don't hurry the hell up, this pill's gonna wear off." One hand on the wheel, one hand on his... er... Now tell me that's not unsafe.

Bwahahahaha I crack me up.

I've spent most of my evening reading about the "Church" of Scientology while listening to Scott Joplin MIDI's. Whoopie!

OK, I don't ask for much. For once, I'm asking a favor. If you have ever heard one of KISS' songs and said "Oh yeah, this song rocks!" please sign this petition to get KISS inducted into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame. They have been eligible since 1999 but have thus far been ignored. In my eyes, their exclusion is a slap in the face of rock 'n' roll and rock 'n' roll fans everywhere. Honestly, who is more rock 'n' roll than KISS? NOBODY! If you won't do it for me, DO IT FOR ROCK 'N' ROLL!

I was looking through some papers and came across a rant I wrote a long time ago concerning retail customers. It still applies, so I'll post it here.

Retail

Here are a few guidelines to make retail stores a much happier place.

Wait Your Turn - I don't care if you are the flippin' Pope. You're no more important than the person I am currently assisting.

Dumb Asses - Go home and send a smart person in to shop for you, you'll only piss me off.

On Your Lunch Break? - This doesn't mean the entire world is going to step aside because you have limited time. Go eat a sandwich and come back after work.

Mind Your Children - Haven't you idiots ever heard of the Adam Walsh story? If you truly love your children, keep them with you. AND CLEAN UP AFTER THE LITTLE BASTARDS!

Get Off Your Ass On Sundays - Don't come in on a Saturday and get pissed at me because we're out of an item that has been on sale ALL WEEK. Bring your ass in when the sale starts Sunday morning, cuz we know your heathen ass ain't gonna be in church anyway.

If You Receive An Ad In The Mail - Check the date. It may not be in effect yet. Or, knowing our good ol' United States Postal Service, it may be expired. You can read, right?

Don't Speak English? - STAY HOME! Unless you're a hottie lookin to get her green card, heh heh.

On Friday, February 28, KISS played a one time show in Melbourne, Australia with the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra, with MSO decked out in full KISS makeup. While originals Paul Stanley, Gene Simmons, and Peter Criss were present, Ace Frehley, who did not want to participate, was replaced by Tommy Thayer. The concert will be on Pay-Per-View and will be released on DVD and hopefully CD. The concert has gotten very good reviews and I can't wait to see it. I just wish I could have been there in person. Sigh.

OK, you may find this hard to believe, but I actually went out Friday night. I was invited to join some friends at the local comedy club. They called at 9:30, the show started at 10:30. D'oh! So I ran downstairs, hopped into the shower, and drove like someone from Michigan (that means fast and reckless) to the club. I met them there about fifteen minutes before the show started. After we were seated, we had a few drinks and chatted a while. Then, without warning, the lights went out, disco lights came on, and some very loud music started playing. It startled the shit right out of me. I swear I jumped three inches out of my seat. White men can jump! I almost made a run for the damn fire exit.

The night's featured comedian was Tom Gregory and the headliner was Bert "Chili" Challis, a former writer for The Tonight Show. Both men were very funny. If either one of them come to your town, you must go see them. You will not be disappointed.